I'm in a big Indian city, a state capital; a guy who's lived here for years is showing me around town. He thinks the country is falling apart fast--famine ahead, maybe an eco-crash. Under his gloom-and-doom, I sense a touch of smugness that he sees ahead and they're all so blind.

And I'm not sure he's right. The city looks vibrant and rather happy to me--poor, polluted and scruffy, yes, but full of life and potential. He leads me to the Capitol Building, where the state congress now meets. It's a Victorian neoclassical dome, with added Indian touches--like the stone caryatids holding up the columns, who are sexy swaying devas, not austere Greeks. We walk through a colonnade between rows of divine dancers...

My guide says "The state legislature's hopeless--corrupt and factionalized by religion and caste." I think "But it's still a democracy, despite all those pressures! What a contrast to China or Egypt or Pakistan." I hear faint music in the background and listen. A happy piece that sounds like a mix of an Indian pop song with that Anna Magdalena Bach minuet I'm learning. A blend of East and West, like the Capitol. I like it.

Then it happens. Halfway down the passage, one of the statues winks at me. I start and stare, but now that my guide is passing, she's innocent stone. Only after he passes do I see another flicker of movement, a faint, playful gleam in her eyes. She's hiding from him! But not from me.

This guy is such a pessimist he's blind to the life around him... no, not blind! Grim to the point IT hides from HIM! A world bursting with goddesses eager to come out and play... except around goddess-dampers like him. No WONDER the world looks dead to pessimists--they're such a drag that even goddesses hide.

• Caryatids = I stood in line to register for school today--it was so slow we were a living line of caryatids. Later, I worked on a statue based on a dream; it LOOKED different, but had just this "come out and play" theme.
• Caryatid/deva winks = in my sculpture class, a girl I like smiled and winked at me today... Make friends with her. She's fun. My dreams like her too.
• Sour pessimist = The voice of my habits. It's SO negative that fun energy avoids him/it/me, doesn't even TRY to challenge that sour view... I have to DO something about this idiot!

I don't have an inner child. I have an inner grownup. Way too grown up.

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