THAT DAY

In Best of Science 2017, I read a startling piece--"DIY Scientist" by David Epstein, on Jill Viles, a patient who didn't just self-diagnose her rare genetic disorder, but went on to diagnose (and lengthen the life of) her dad, and then an athlete, Priscilla Lopes-Shliep, who Viles deduced had a variant of the disorder that looked quite different. Though she met with a lot of dismissal at first, her tale encourages me--also self-diagnosed with a rare genetic disorder, and treating it without medical coverage. If Jill can...

THAT NIGHT...

Born feral, the talking kitten warily skitters in my yard. But Cleo likes me and I her. So I try to nourish her. Hard, for she denies her cathood! And thus can't possibly eat catfood. I must sly-trick her wary heart, entice her with catfood I swear ain't. "Hey, Cleo, try Wolf-N-Puma Brand! Wild ass, lots of bull, king salmon--beasts slain only by the great hunters. No tame puss could ever slay mega-prey!" Really they're mere kibble, pretzels braided to balloon effigies of moose and deer. But they're protein-rich and low-carb... feline ideal! But only if Cleo buys my sneaky spiel, spun to save her. Sly psych alone will nourish that dear pointed ear. So am I feral as Cleo, hot to deny my obvious species? I do testify I'm inhuman--a common trope among us autistics. But social anorexia? Must I turn up kit-nose at mediocrity, yowl for tiger's due? Is that integrity Or just kit-fuss?

NOTES IN THE MORNING

• Diet: literal! Just read Steven Gundry's The Plant Paradox. He touts a low-protein diet full of starchy roots, based on the diets of the longest-lived human tribes. But... I'm not human. I have Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome, a genetic mutation making me bad at building collagen; I worked out through trial and error that I need a diet rich in nuts, berries and leaves, low-carb and high-protein. Yet I feel a need not to live off other creatures' pain--to stay vegetarian. Dilemma! EDS often causes Asperger's too, and like many Aspies, my armor's weak; I'm solitary AND dangerously persuadable. The dream hints that to build health, rejecting humanity helps. Exaggerated? Alienated? Sure. But I'm alive to be alienated!
• ACTION: Gundry's done some good research... but so have I. And if I have to stoke my alienation, feed myself a little bull, to legitimize my special needs... so be it.

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