Gunmen hold the theater audience hostage, but I'm a short girl and I slip out.
On a bridle path I find manure, but the only thing that melts gunmen is mud...
I'm at a pool party in Frankenstein's McMansion. He's gotten lazy--lets AI design his creatures,
endangering their health. Then my girlfriend Spaniela wants to try sex in the pool--in public...
CAUTION: EXHIBITIONIST DOG
An elf, centuries old but looking about twelve, loves a human in his sixties. People call him a child molester.
So each takes a potion to change their apparent age. Now they look like an old woman molesting a boy!
CAUTION: DISTURBING APPEARANCES
DAY: I'm floundering through half a dozen legal, financial, and health crises. And now King Trump is back.
DREAM: I'm a student in a crowded miserable middle school. But the girls start a traveling orgy...
CAUTION: READ THE TITLE
I live in a haunted tower with vampires and ghosts. But they're reasonable neighbors,
unlike the tank column of invading Germans; they say they'll exterminate us all...
CAUTION: FASCISTS RETURN
First I try to put a dowel down the exact center of a carboard tube, but this innocuous project
turns inward til I'm blindly sticking tweezers into my own left eye, and aiming for my brain...
CAUTION: ICK FACTOR
In a garage sale, I find a huge Albert Bierstadt painting of a girl and a gryphon
picnicking on a cliff-ledge. I offer $100,000 for it, but it may cost even more...
CAUTION: NUDITY; SPECIES-BENT LOVERS?
I discover a cafe full of near-nude girls in bondage gear. They eye me, amused at my shock.
Mixed feelings: desire for them but fear of bondage--emphatically not my thing. So what is?
CAUTION: NUDITY
DREAM: Angels ask a circle of us newlydeads, "What's your dream?", wanting quick answers. I fear they'll grant it!
NEXT DAY: On TV, Kelly Corrigan asks a circle of spiritual therapists & ministers "What's your dream," wanting...
A singer in a nightgown knocks on my door. Opening a briefcase, she says "Here are my sisters."
Inside, a wooden maze--where a rat and a mouse nest. Her sisters! And what's her animal form?
CAUTION: NUDITY
1: A witch gives me flying lessons on her broom, over San Francisco Bay. Cold, windy, hazardous, exhiliarating...
2: I build a fusion rocket in my back yard! Tiny payload, just a test, but this engine'll open up the Solar System...
1: Quit the Mage-Guild: they churn out spell-regulations. I don't even do spells, I'm a shaman not a mage...
2: Quit the Swim Team: they won't even give me a locker! Anyone can steal my ID and dream journal...
CAUTION: HARSH ADVICE FOR A HARSH ERA
Giant chefs chop food, and occasionally drop crumbs on the floor--a city of ant-size people.
Tiny truckers cut up vegetable slices and bagel crumbs to distribute them all over town...
My sister turns into a lion-girl who's not my sister. Our family's prone to skin cancer,
but this girl sprawls in the sun all day. Sexy, but her message for me is nonsexual...
CAUTION: LION NUDITY, ANTI-A.M.A. ADVICE
DREAM: to see a film, Colquoon or Colhoun, I take a surreal ride through a multiplex...
NEXT DAY: a friend shows me an article about a 'forgotten' surrealist, Ithel Colquhoun...
Our tabby cat works hard at her ballet barre, but our Persian just
lies around snoozing. Wait, she's not a lazy ballerina, but a...
CAUTION: NUDE CAT
I'm a diplomat from the were-kangaroos. In my diplomatic pouch, I grow a Memory Ruby.
Is my personal data vulnerable to theft? Well, no more so than on your human phones...
CAUTION: NUDE MARSUPIAL
I'm on a ship off Big Sur that swerves to miss a Navy vessel on a collision course. But
I'm standing at the bow, and spot a periscope dead ahead. Race toward the bridge...
I'm a girl in a college dorm. CRASH! A Concorde jet used our street as a runway and failed to lift off...
I wake & peer out my dorm window. Below, a ruined jetliner. But how'd I know it was a Concorde?
I wake AGAIN--at home. The proof my dream was predictive was a dream itself! Yet that crash...
I'm drawing a background--Mt Shasta, meaning ESP or other paranormal stuff. Then I make room
for a portrait of a dream-creature reading. But my eraser smudges! I need new art tools...
CAUTION: NUDE CREATURE
I'm unbelievably hairy--is it fake? I look like a poodle, with a monster pouf at
the hips, hiding what gender I am. But I'm shedding big hanks. Soon I'll see...
I'm a cheetah-boy in a tree above my childhood home. Our 'hood's full of cat people, and I
want to stay and marry a catgirl. But Trump is getting so crazy! Gotta choose. Stay or go?
CAUTION: NUDE CHEETAH
We're wolf people hiking above Lake Tahoe. Spring came to the shores, but as we climb, we re-enter
winter. Our fur's short; we'll need to grow long coats, and toughen our soles--if that's how you spell it...
CAUTION: NUDE WOLVES; POLITICS
I'm a girl in love with an elf-sorceress who grants me long life and good health, at a cost:
attractive women don't notice me now, forcing fidelity. I didn't plan to cheat anyway...